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Anniversary to celebrate?

9/7/2014

8 Comments

 
Today is an anniversary for me. It's not one that you'd think of celebrating. It's on this day almost 40 years ago that I was attacked by school 'mates' as I was walking to catch the bus home from my friend's birthday tea.
Four of them approached us; two girls, two boys and things escalated fast. By the time they'd finished, I had been kicked in the head, my ear cartilage was broken, I had bruises all up my arms and my back had been stamped on repeatedly.
My parents took it further and the police took two of the attackers to court.
I had to endure the next day at school and the main instigator and her friends (who hadn't been there at the time) coming up to me all day saying I was overreacting and that it had been a joke.

When they realised that it had got serious and they were going to be in court for it, things began to get nastier. I was in the same classes as the two girls and the opinion of our year was divided. I'd already been beaten physically, but that year I had to endure the mental beating-up too - not just from those who had been there on that playing field at the time either. Everyone had an opinion on what had happened, depending on who they preferred to listen to.
When the court case came around, the Magistrate (juvenile court) asked me a question I've never forgotten.
"Are you frightened of this girl?"
I replied that yes, I was frightened of her. I didn't say she'd kicked seven shades of shit out of me, why the hell wouldn't I be? But maybe if I had, I wouldn't have come to this thought-process:
Yes, she and three others intimidated me to the point that my mind decided not to fight back because I'd save myself a more severe beating - hindsight is 20-20 but I'll never know if that notion would have held true. One of the boys
had no problem in hitting girls, I know that because he hit me so would one or all of them have jumped in if I had started getting the better of the instigator? I'll never know, the only thing I do know is this, they did beat me, they did intimidate me - there and after, for months - but they did NOT kill me.
I survived, I developed and after the case I started thinking "Yes, she DID frighten me, but if that was her best effort, she didn't kill me, I got up, I went on and I believe I'm a stronger and more tenacious person because of it."
Did they do me a favour that evening back in the 70s? Hell NO! I took the situation and I
built on it. I get the reward, I get the praise, the kudos, I did it.
I survived it all.
So do I celebrate this anniversary? No, not particularly, but I remember.


8 Comments
Louise
9/7/2014 04:08:30 am

I admire the way you came through that terrible ordeal. Having been bullied both verbally and physically by my father I can well understand, in part, what you went through. It can either crush your spirit or make it stronger, more resilient. ..either way it changes you for life. Mine is a constant and daily memory which I'm still, some 47 years on, still trying to overcome.
Thank you for writing this blog. I think it is going to help many who have suffered from this kind of assault.

Reply
Paula Lofting link
9/7/2014 04:30:06 am

When life does these things to us, it shapes our character and you my friend have a very special personality, a kind caring person who will do anything for those she holds dear, but a bad ass if she wants to be. I can see you in your books and boy what character to play. Love you Shell Gent!

Reply
Kirsty Coward
9/7/2014 05:12:36 am

I applaud you for staying strong and sticking with making them pay for the evil thing that they did to you. Hope that doesn't sound patronising but it would be so easy to just pretend it didn't happen but you found the strength to stand up to them. More people should be like you xxx

Reply
Michelle
9/7/2014 06:09:31 am

Thank you for your comments Louise, Paula and Kirsty.
It was almost unbearable at the time but that was then, this is now :)

Reply
Catherine Vigna link
9/7/2014 08:46:17 am

You, my dear friend, are one of the strongest women I 'know'. You have my undying respect and admiration, and have every right to be so proud of the wonderful woman you have become! Love you. xoxox

Reply
Michelle
10/7/2014 12:25:55 am

Love you too Catherine. Thank you xx

Reply
abs link
10/7/2014 05:16:22 am

Michelle you came through the ordeal stronger mentally and good on you. I remember bein held up.at knife point in way home from school for 50p he was caught and lockd up i was lucky to get away. Latest was a few years ago walking a friend home and having cheekbone shattered n jaw feactured.in 2 places with a bat. Police didnt want to know as my fault for walking a female home at 2am. But all though had mental scars from both. I came through them alive and get stronger each time i think about it. Glad you can look back and feel the strength mentally.from within xx

Reply
Michelle
11/7/2014 05:10:18 pm

Thanks Abs :) xx

Reply



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